I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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