Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Randomize
