$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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