I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
well you can't waste a boner
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
my being single is dangerous.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
