Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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