your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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