what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
