He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
