We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Randomize
