so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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