your thong is hanging out like whoa
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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