First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
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