Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
