BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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