He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
