How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
