i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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