what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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