6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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