he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize