OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize