More tranny stories later!
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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