is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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