check it out our google latitudes are spooning
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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