i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
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