And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
