Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
