Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
