You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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