did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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