I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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