the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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