So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize