oh god the rape fog is back!
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
