listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
