ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
It's Friday. Sex?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
