1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize