Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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