I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize