Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
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