I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
