hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Plan B is the new Plan A
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
