I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
