Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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