how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I have aggressive nipples.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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