I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
