So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
