Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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