But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
