Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
